Posted by Catherine, the redhead mom blogger on Aug 15, 2010 in Brian and Mom
“Brian, I need you to sit with me and go over what you need at school so I can fill out all your school forms.”
“Just do the same as last year.”
“Well, do you need new gym shorts?”
“Mine are kinda tight.”
“I take it that’s a – yes.”
“I have my red shorts I can wear.”
“Then I take it that’s a – no.”
“I could use another one.”
“Then it’s a – yes.”
“I guess.”
“OH GOOD God! I’m getting you a pair – even if I end up using them!”
“Funny mom.”
“I’m ordering pictures. You’ll have to dress nice at registration.”
“Why?”
“Because registration is when they take your school photos.”
“No they don’t. They take photos for the Yearbook and my ID card.”
“Yes. Same photos – your school photos.”
“No – they’re Yearbook and ID photos mom.”
(Mom’s eye begins twitching).
“No. Remember last year – they were all done at registration.”
“No mom that’s not right.”
“Brian, I am giving you a check for all of this, just like I did last year. Just humor me and look nice for registration, OK?”
“God Mom, sometimes you make this so difficult!”
I am happy to report that Brian went to registration and did not order gym shorts or photographs, even though I gave him a check to cover it. He wore a t-shirt and did not “dress nice” because it was hot. He also came home with the check.
Grandmothers will not be getting school pictures for Christmas.
As I’m retiring to drink a glass of wine and do deep breathing exercises in the backyard, a teenage voice in my home can be heard saying,
“Mom? Where are you going? I think I need gym shorts after all . . .”
Posted by Catherine, the redhead mom blogger on Jul 25, 2010 in Brian and Mom
“Oh good God boys, what on earth are you watching?”
“The Decent.”
“I thought you didn’t like scary movies.”
“Since when?”
“Okay, well I can’t watch this – I’m going to read. If you still want me to watch a movie with you, then call me when this is over and you are watching something more calm.”
“Okay Mom.”
(an hour goes by)
“Mom?”
“Is the movie over?”
“Yeah. It’s safe. You can come back and sit down.”
Teenagers everyday are convincing parents in subtle ways just how little they know.
I submit for you some examples of how my son tries to make it clear that he knows everything because he is a teenager and I know nothing because I am a mom -
“Look at that big tree Brian!”
(Sigh). “It’s a sequoia mom.”
***
“Wow, the moon it bright tonight!”
“Mom, the moon does not give off light of its own. The Moon reflects the Sun’s light.”
***
“Come on Brian, it’s 7:30 – let’s go!”
“It’s only 7:29 Mom!”
***
“Wow, it’s hot today. I think its 90 degrees out.”
(Glancing up from i-Touch) “It’s only 92 Mom.”
***
“What about these tennis shoes Brian?”
(sigh) “They’re skater shoes Mom.”
***
“Brian, is that your i-phone on the floor?”
“It’s an ipad Touch Mom.”
***
Do you have this kind of conversation with your teenager? I’m on to his game though.
I handle it by going quietly into my room and banging my head against the wall.
In 2006 when my son Brian was 11 and still in grade school, I watched a video of a speech on an amazing new website I stumbled upon which forever changed the way I looked at Brian’s APD and the way he learns.
It also changed the way I viewed my life and what I was doing for a living.
Brian was just beginning 6th grade and his teacher didn’t like boys who didn’t sit still and weren’t 100% focused on the tasks at had. I was tired of educating teachers on how Brian learns. He had a handful of great teachers who understood – the rest hated teaching kids.
Really.
But Sir Robinsens lecture about kids and creativity was like the Mormon Tabernacle Choir chiming in to sing back up to my “Brian is smart, he just learns a little differently, and when he looks like he is day-dreaming he is actually looking at the problem in pictures” solo gospel.
And it made me look at school in a completely new way.
Last week I received my regular TED newsletter and was excited to see that Sir Ken Robinson was back at TED doing what he does best: being a champion for the children in schools with his new lecture Bring on the learning revolution!
I am happy to say that middle school and high school have been a completely different experience for my son Brian and the teachers are amazing.
Especially his math teacher Mr. Barnum and his science teacher Mr. Benenson.
They should be invited to speak at TED.
And Brian?
He’d just like to go to college on a football scholarship to study astronomy and math.
And for any of you parents out there with kids who are struggling in school: your child will turn out fine – but you must never give up!
I never made my son feel like he wasn’t smart or treated him like he wasn’t doing his best. He was. But sitting all day in the same class with the same teacher is like a death sentence to kids with APD (and most boys).
These special kids need our help . . . and teachers like Mr Benenson and Mr Barnum . . . and people like Sir Ken Robinson lecturing on their behalf .
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